The Bold and the Beautiful from a black guy’s perspective.

Incredible smfh

Yes, you read the title correctly. Shaun Howard watches soap operas. Get your laughs out now, but I’ll be honest. The only I watch this show is because it was the only way I could bond with my mom and my grandma. Trust me. When you’re five years old, and you want to watch “Air Time” (The Michael Jordan VHS from back in 93. I’m that young? lol), you have to watch Bold and the Beautiful.

Listen. I’m 20 years old, and I feel like I’ve seen the same ol characters for at least 15 years. I’m to the point where I know what the writers are gonna do every season, and personally I’m sick of it. Wanna know why I’m sick of it? It’s annoying as fuck, b. I’m tired of the love triangle with Steffy, Liam, and Hope. It’s first off, disgusting. Two, it’s stupid. Three, it’s pointless to all of your viewers. It’s been a year. Liam still can’t choose? A year in Soap Operas is like 10 years. So, for the rest of his life, Liam Spencer will not choose who he’ll want to be with? Before I get in depth with this triangle, let’s cover the supporting cast of this shit.

Brooke Logan Forrester: Hope’s fine ass mother smh

I’d pipe though

I feel like Brooke Logan Forrester (Which one though? Ridge, Eric or Thorne? She fucked all of them at least 10 times) needs to just shut the fuck up on this show for a minute. Wanna know why? I don’t know if any of you Brooke fans realize this, but when I was younger, Brooke was always in this stupid ass triangles. The one that I remember the most was when she was trying to get at Thorne, when he was with Macy. As a 5 year old, I swear, I thought Brooke was the 2nd hottest white women on TV (Tiffani Thiessen was #1 because she was BADDDDDDDDDDD).

Brooke is the superhero of heauxs around the world. Ladies, think about it. You know that one girl in the office that sleeps with the head-up of the company to get the job she wants. That’s what Brooke did. She was nothing before she married Eric in the early 90s, and then once she got with Ridge, then lost Ridge to Taylor, then the whole Thorne shit, then when she fucked Deacon… then she went back to Ridge…. You get my point. Her vagina has to be so stretched out, she makes Superhead look like a model citizen of the United States. Granted, this is a Soap Opera, but my god. The heauxism is incredible to watch on TV.

Anyway, what’s my point about her?

I know Brooke wants to protect her daughter, and I know she wants to tell Steffy all this shit about how “she needs to leave Liam alone”, and how “Liam only wants to be with Hope, and you need to let him go,” but I’m sure that Stephanie said the same exact shit to her in the mid-90s. When you have the heaux gene, and you had Hope by sleeping with your daughter’s husband, it’s best you don’t say shit. Plus, if I don’t recall, before Hope met Liam, Brooke fucked her boyfriend at Hope’s 18th birthday party a couple of years ago. Brooke, your point is invalid. The only way to validate your point is to sleep with Liam in 3 months. Then we’ll be good here.

Bill and Katie Spencer: Liam’s Parents

I see *sips water*

Now we have Brad and old Victoria from The Young and the Restless. Bill Spencer Jr. is the classic deadbeat “but I love my son and I’ll give him a big time job in my company because I feel bad” dad, while Katie Logan Spencer is just an idiot. Yes, I said Katie was an idiot. The only true statement Katie has said on this show was when she was speaking about how Liam is messing around and trying to tear apart two families.

Bill wants his son to be mentally tough and like a “Spencer.” Whatever that means, nigga. If you want him to be like you, you want him to play around with two females, one you were with, and then eventually make up his mind. Yup. Like a Spencer. I salute you, Bill.

katy doing it for me

Katie is a weak women. How can you go back to a man who was sleeping with another women? Like, she speaks to Steffy like she knows how to control her marriage? Last I checked, before you had that “heart attack,” Bill was gonna move in with Steffy and probably marry her. It’s incredible how you, of all people wants to speak to Steffy and think that you’re so much better than her when your husband’s penis was inside her too for a couple of years. It’s okay though, don’t raise your voice again Katie. We don’t want you to lose that child.

Ridge Forrester and Taylor Forrester Hayes: Steffy’s Parents

incredible

Here’s my thing about Ridge and Taylor: They are actually good parents when it comes to Steffy. Ridge, who is the master of love triangles hasn’t really gotten involved that much unlike the ultimate  soap opera heaux mother Brooke. I mean, Ridge is basically Hope’s father too, and he knows his limits to get involved.

Taylor, on the other hand…. Look Taylor. I get it. You don’t want your daughter to “lose” to Hope because it reminds you how the whole Ridge thing happened, and how you lost to a heaux. I get it. But stop. Stop getting involved. You don’t need to involve yourself anymore. Wanna know why you lost out to Brooke? Because Ridge wanted to pipe. It’s not a hard concept for him. He’s the kang of the soap opera coons (X_X!!!). It’s not like he doesn’t still love you. He does. He just loves Brooke’s vagina a little more. Besides, you’re Taylor. You have power, go sleep with Thorne. He was easily into you. But nope, you want to peep your head in your daughter’s business.

Rick Forrester: Hope’s brother

Nigga fuck you

First and foremost, Fuck everything about Rick Forrester. Wanna know why I say this? This dude is the biggest fuckboy I’ve seen in my life. I don’t even know anyone in my life that is a fuckboy like this dude. Rick doesn’t peep into this love triangle because he wants to “protect” his sister; he jumps in because he knows that he can somehow get Thomas to fall in love with Hope (SMH), so he can get Caroline. He’s such a fuckboy for this. The Shaun (#Shonn) Howard coalition doesn’t support this movement. The fact that he got some random congo nigga to help him tell a lie makes me hate this fuckboy even more. Nothing good happens to fuckboys. Eventually, he’ll get his ass beat.

Now that we got that done, this love triangle can finally be addressed once and for all.

Hope Logan:

Child.

Hope is the biggest child grown up on television. There is nothing wrong with it, but it’s just funny. Her childish ways really keep me entertained everyday. Yes, I get it. Liam broke your “commitment,” and he likes hanging out with Steffy, who you hate (well, dislike) because she did attempt to steal him from you, and then she let Liam lay the pipe after you left him, then well yeah, it goes from there.  Now, on Today’s episode, she finally says she’s “had enough” (We’ve heard this SOOOOOOOOO many times), and is gonna move out of his place because of Rick’s boldface lie to you today. Ah, I get it. All you had to do Hope, was just give Liam some dome or something before you both broke up the first time. Satisfy your man, b.

I love the fact how she’s so intent on blaming everybody about her failing relationship with Liam. It’s not Steffy’s fault. It’s not Liam’s fault. It’s really nobody’s fault, Hope. But you want your life to be soooooooooooooo perfect, and your relationships to be perfect, but sweetie, life isn’t perfect.

But do I think you’re making a good decision for leaving Liam? I mean, if you’re fed up….. go ahead and cook by yourself. At least Liam was your first. (If you get that, I praise you forever). You know what the writers should do? They should write in another black character who’s about the same age as Hope, and let her get a black man. Wanna know who?

*cough cough*

Steffy Forrester:

she’s so fine.. lawd

Steffy Forrester is the new age Brooke Logan. It’s hilarious how Bradley Bell has gotten bored that he’s just recycling old storylines and making them relevant again. It’s HILARIOUS to ya boy. I will say this about Steffy; I don’t think she’s a bad person at all. Yeah, she’s a heaux, and only wants taken men, but at the same time, she’s just misunderstood. I still find it funny how people say that “she tricked Liam into marrying her” and all that shit. Tell you what, Liam could have walked away from her. But he didn’t. The nigga said I do, and then proceeded to pipe her because she was gonna give it up to him, while the child said no.

When Steffy speaks to Brooke and Hope, it’s truly entertaining to me. Not because she wants to speak to them, but her actions, and her responses are classic television.

I mean, she’s right when she tells Liam that “Hope is a child, and that he needs a real women in his life.” It’s true. She’s a real women. But, if Hope and Liam officially call it quits, will she still want him? Or will she move on to another taken man? Now that’s the question we’ll all find out soon.

Liam Spencer:

And finally, this nigga

Liam Spencer.

I’m so sick of this nigga. So so sooooooooooo sick of this nigga.

I’m to the point of no return with Liam.

Is it hard to make up your mind who you want to be with?

I hate that the writers are making Liam like another version of Ridge. It’s so sad. The character was legit when he first started on this show. He had some balls when he stood up to his deadbeat father. But now? He’s such a bitch. A bitchmade white nigga. I know Liam isn’t that in love with Hope to not stand up to her at times.

I was crying one day last week when Hope was saying some bullshit to him, and he said something smart. Then, once he saw her face, he was like, “I didn’t mean it like that, I’m so sorry baby.” Then, when he was begging for Hope… in his underwear. Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan. People were like, “Aw, that’s true love.” No the fuck it isn’t. It’s simply stupid as fuck.  If Liam loves Hope so much, like he says, why does he turn to Steffy all the time? If Liam loves Steffy so much, why does he want to marry Hope?

LMAOOOO

I just don’t understand how lame he is now. Basically, Liam. I have some advice for you. Let Hope leave you. Don’t fight for her anymore. You lost. It’s okay. Liam, don’t even try to go after Steffy anymore. You left Steffy for no reason. Okay, you had a reason, but still. Don’t. It’s not worth it neither. If anything Liam Spencer, just leave. Go meet some broad somewhere else. Then bring her back a couple of years later.  At the end of the day Liam, you’ll never be happy with either one of these females.

This love triangle reminds me of this show’s love triangle:

It’s just the opposite.

If you’ve never seen Beverly Hills 90210, you need to find the DVDs, and watch em. Brandon Walsh was the gawd. Can’t tell me otherwise, b.

Anyway. On 90210, Kelly Taylor (?) had a constant love triangle with Brandon and Dylan. It was like this because Kelly would choose Dylan, then the following season, she’d choose Brandon. In fact, this love triangle was sooooooo real, Brandon and Kelly almost got married, and then they both called it off. Sure, once Brandon left, and Kelly found that random lawyer white dude, she was sort of happy, but at the end (like the last episode…), she finally chose Dylan.

Is this what it’s gonna take for Liam to finally figure it out? The last episode to finally figure it out?

Hopefully not.

As a somewhat fan (Okay, I’m a fan of this show, it makes me laugh) of this show, I want this shit done now. I am sick and tired of watching this love triangle everyday. To the point where ESPN’s College Football Live will get my full attention at the 12:30 pm slot. The writers must fix this love triangle, just for all the fans out here. It’s been a year long. It’s dragged out, and quite frankly, it fucking sucks.

Lane and Matthew know

But yes, those are my thoughts about The Bold and the Beautiful.

Have a comment? Leave one. I’ll respond to some of them, I guess. Or maybe none of them.

– Shaun

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One thought on “The Bold and the Beautiful from a black guy’s perspective.

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