I had a debate with a SEC/Tennessee fan who is still salty about Lane Kiffin leaving their conference/team for USC.
Look at the picture above. Lane is giving the “awkwardly” smile, while his wife (God bless that bunny, Lawd) is smiling without knowing why she’s smiling.
Now, I’m not going to defend Mr. Kiffin for leaving Tennessee in a douche fashion for my favorite team because it was cold, heartless, and sad. (I laughed while typing that. #KoldGame) But at the end of the day, it’s gonna be 3 football seasons since Mr. Kiffin has left Tennessee. Tennessee fans laughed at our 8-5 record in 2010 saying all sorts of junk about how Lane is a scumbag (which, I don’t know if I can say right now, at the moment), how Lane can’t coach (We’ll get to this in a second), and to how the USC program would be setback to at least 5 years with not only the sanctions, but with him as a coach (I’m literally laughing at these comments now).
Fast forward to 2012.
The preseason poll hasn’t came out yet, but I’m going to assume in my arrogant fashion (Thanks to Zack Jerome, the founder of Arrogant Nation) that USC will be in the top 1. Yes, I said it. The top 1. The #1 team in the land in the preseason. (What’s 10 wins on a year of a bowl ban to a motherfucker like me, can you please remind me? That’s what Lane Kiffin is telling his haters.) But now, I think it’s confirmed that Lane’s arrogance is on a whole ‘nother level.
Kiff is taking “backlash” (I put that in quotes because I feel like it’s not backlash, it’s fake outrage because Lane Kiffin outsmarted the NCAA and folks don’t want to see him succeed in anyway possible) because of his recruitment of Silas Redd, the new USC running back. But hey, flashback to June 2010 where USC players were free agents. Was their any “faux outrage” when Vidal Hazelton left USC? How about when Travon Patterson? Nah? You see where I’m going with this.
At least, Lane arrogantly had the respect to call newly Penn State coach Bill O’Brien. I mean, can you imagine how the conversation went?
Lane: “Hey, Bill. Fuck you, fuck the Patriots, and I’m gonna recruit your best running back. Not only will I recruit him, I’ll get him to come to USC.”
Bill: Wait, what are you speaking of?
Lane: I’ll be at Silas’ house in 3 days, tough break for you, huh?
Bill: I hate you. *hangs up*
See that? Lane is so arrogant that he flew 6 assistant coaches to Redd’s house in Connecticut (?) to show him a powerpoint on USC, and what his role would be on offense. Not to mention to tell him that he’s playing with the 2012 Heisman Trophy winner, Matthew Barkley. What does Penn State have going for them right now? (Rhetorical question, don’t even bother answering.)
That’s besides the point anyway. Back on track to where this blog is headed.
I wake up at 3 pm after a 5 hour nap, and as I check my phone, I see that it’s 3:17 in the afternoon. I also see that I get a text from ESPN (Don’t laugh nigga, I get all the information before you do) that Redd and his father announced that he was going to USC. I’m thinking, “Well, this nigga was out in SoCal hanging out with Woody (Robert Woods, #2) and Barks all weekend, plus its SoCal.” So, then in the mist of my twitter “break,” I log in to twitter and find that Silas Redd and USC is trending. As I’m going into the tag, I see nothing but scorn and hate about how “Lane Kiffin is a doucher”, “USC will lose 4 games this year (That prediction is so wrong, that is so ridiculously hilarious to me), or my favorite from Oregon fans: “We’ll still beat you twice.” (Before the summer ends, Oregon and Washington fans will be addressed because they need to be addressed. I think Oregon fans have a short memory of what happened in Autzen last season, but I digress.)
But then, I happened to see this tweet.
I don’t live in SoCal, but I found this very very very hilarious to me.
I happened to RT (Retweet for those who don’t have twitter) and just said, You mad bro, it’s okay.
He responds with this, and I kid you not:
I thought this was about Tennessee’s “successful” program compared to USC’s program. But now, since your program is trash right now (Can’t confirm or deny this is Lane’s fault *snickers*), you want to claim SEC’s success instead your program’s success like you stated in your earlier tweet. Yup, makes complete sense. Complete sense.
And then it becomes predictable:
Yup, USC lost the 2004 BCS title, but since the AP still claims the title, this is very much pointless at this point. I usually don’t entertain idiots, but I was in that mood to do so today. Most people in the north/south/east/west don’t even know what happened at USC, and then when you proceed to tell them the story, they still don’t get it. Don’t get mad that Lane Kiffin goes into “SEC” country (since they play the best football in the SEC, rumor has it. I guess so, winning 6 straight BCS titles is no joke, even though Florida lucked out in 2006 because USC lost to UCLOL, and nobody wanted to see a rematch between Ohio State and Michigan. Which is funny how this all turned out in 2011 when “SEC” homers ESPN were claiming for a
snoozefest rematch with Bama and LSU.) and takes your best players. That’s not my fault, bro. I’m just a fan.
I told his dude that USC is a better coaching job than Tennessee, and a lot of people would agree with me. Why?
USC’s tradition is unmatched in college football outside of Alabama, Oklahoma, and Notre Dame. What’s the difference at these programs with USC?
You’re in Southern California.
At this point, I wanted to laugh at this dude.
Think about it. USC is gonna be in the top 1 in the preseason poll. Now, I agree with him that Lane messed up their program in a big way. I’m sorry it happened, but don’t get mad at him for leaving for USC. Clearly, it’s a better job. If it wasn’t, Kiff wouldn’t have left Tennessee. Folks are so quick to jump on the fact that Lane failed in Oakland (Wasn’t his fault, Al Davis, god rest his soul didn’t even give Lane a chance to prosper), and 2009, Lane shot his mouth off because he had to get some type of attention to the ailing Tennessee program. I mean, let’s think about it. Any type of dude with a brain isn’t gonna shoot his mouth off at Urban Meyer, just for no reason.
(The funny thing about Urban Meyer is that, he, in himself, is what “SEC” homers claim Lane Kiffin is. Except Urban won because he had Jesus running around throwing wobbly spirals, and using the “truck stick” on them SEC linebackers. Funny how when Tebow graduates, Urban has one bad year at Florida, and then announces his “retirement.” Hmmm. Back to the point at hand.)
So now, in the mist of this conversation, he finally gets back to Tennessee football. Since we’re all supposed to know it.
So, I looked up Tennessee’s football history, and it’s very dry. 6 national titles, i don’t even know how many heisman titles, and they have a fewer winning percentage than USC.
This guy was in such denial about it, that he said this:
True, you have more all-time wins. Wanna know why? USC had to vacate 2 wins in the 04 season, and all of 2005. That’s 14 wins, making that win total to 793, plus that would make the winning percentage even higher. I didn’t know more wins meant you were automatically a better program. That’s like UCLA basketball telling Carolina and Kentucky basketball that they have a better program because they have more wins overall. 2nd, the school claims 11 national titles. In reality, the 2004 national title isn’t vacated, and it shouldn’t have been vacated. Wanna know why? That whole Reggie Bush situation happened after the 2004 season. Most people don’t realize this. Plus, not to mention, the AP still claims USC as their national champion in 2004. I didn’t realize the heisman is a joke. Maybe because nobody at Tennessee can win it. (Charles Woodson, anyone?!)
The school claims 11. In reality, any team can claim a national title. Tennessee claims 6. USC happens to claim 11.
Then, of course, like every fanbase in the country, he says this:
Yup, I’m gonna regret a guy who brings in top recruiting classes year in and year out, and won 10 games in a probation year, and bringing the program back with swagger and arrogance. Yup. I’m gonna regret this guy:
If Lane Kiffin got up and left USC to coach in the NFL, I wouldn’t be mad at him.
In fact, I’d make sure USC fans had a “Lane Kiffin Appreciation Day.”
Lane can coach. In fact, he can coach damn well (Go watch USC/Oregon and you’ll catch my drift).
I find it hilarious that SEC fans talk about USC. Nobody on the West Coast is focused on them. They claim they hate USC, but yet, find themselves commenting in USC highlight videos talking about how much you hate USC. If you hate a team so much, why do you talk about them? It doesn’t make sense to me, at all. But hey, I’m just a black kid, who lives in the Seattle area, who happens to be a USC fan. Tell you what, SEC fans. Be happy I gave you this attention in this blog because right now, I’m focused on Hawaii, and how Kiff the gawd will prepare us for a national title run.
If we do meet in January, I live you with this: